Thought of you
by NeverlandAwaitsUs
Summary: It started innocently enough. She had reblogged his drawing of the sea and the sunrise. He'd written her an ask to say thanks because he never really got any notes on any of his stuff. She'd asked him if he had more. He showed her his Deviantart page. And with that, their lives became a mess.


It started innocently enough.

She had reblogged his drawing of the sea and the sunrise. He'd written her an ask to say thanks because he never really got any notes on any of his stuff. She'd asked him if he had more. He showed her his Deviantart page.

And with that, their lives became a mess.

Killian had never really been talking to anyone on the internet, it was a simple distraction when he was bored or had no desire to do his homework. A school friend had suggested he should make a Tumblr blog and post his drawings there because she thought they were great. Liam always told him how great he was as well but he himself never saw it.

For him, his drawings had always been an escape from the real world. After his mother had died and his father had left, he had fallen into a huge depression that not even Liam had been able to get him out of. His therapist had suggested drawing as a way out of his depression and he seemed to be a natural.

He had never stopped drawing.

One day he had been so bored that he just made an account. First he had no clue how this whole Tumblr thing actually worked and just went back to Deviantart where he posted his stuff without really thinking about it.

After a while he had gotten the hang of it, reblogged a few things but didn't join a fandom, so followers and notes were rare but they weren't important to him anyway.

And then, after around a month, she had reblogged his art. SaviorPrincess was her URL and it had made him smile. Her blog had been filled with photographs of nature but his was the only drawing he could find.

He had become used to saying thank you to every one (which wasn't really hard if you got around 5 notes on every drawing) but she was the first one to actually write back more than a 'You're welcome' or 'No big deal bro'.

It had been quite the surprise that she had wanted to see more but of course he had sent her the link. She had been quite impressed with his stuff and they talked a bit more during asks and fanmails until they decided that the communication on Tumblr sucked and added each other on Skype.

And now, now he waited. Staring at his clock like a moron. They had chatted for around a month now and she always came on at the same time. He was so eager to talk to her again because he loved when she told him about her days, no matter if they boring or not.

Killian knew the basics about her. Her name was Emma, she lived in a small town in Maine, was sixteen years old, was quite good at school and liked to hang around on 9gag.

Emma also knew the basics about him. His name was Killian, he lived in a 'bloody tiny town' in Ireland, was close to his seventeenth birthday and that he liked drawing and sailing.

He had learned that she was an orphan, living in group homes or foster families all her live and that especially her current family was pure horror but she couldn't escape, no matter how much she wanted to run away.

She had learned about his parents and that he started to live with a foster family when his brother left for the Navy but that he would go live with his brother as soon as he finished his training and would be more at home than at the sea.

He had told her that he never felt like he belonged.

She had told him that she felt the same.

Killian smiled brightly when the little Skype window plopped up and told him that she was online. Timezones sucked big times, Ireland was too far away from Maine but yet, he would always stay awake to talk to her.

 **PirateArtist:** Hey there, love

 **SaviorPrincess:** Damn, you're quick. Did you wait for me? ;)

 **PirateArtist:** I always wait for you and you know that :P How was your day?

 **SaviorPrincess:** Horrible. I brought an A home for my biology exam, better than the one my dumb foster brother had and yet, no one paid attention. It really sucks when no one cares.

 **PirateArtist:** I care, love. An A is great! You studied hard for it.

 **SaviorPrincess:** Thanks :)

They talked long, way too long. It was around 2am when she kicked his ass to bed, telling him that he needed his sleep for school. He told her he didn't care and he'd rather talk to her but she just sent a winking smiley and he groaned inwardly before he said goodnight, sent a heart and got one back.

That's how they spent most of their days. He waited for her to come back from school and they talked until he had to go to bed. Once he had asked her for her phone number but she told him hers was broken and she had to save up more money to actually buy one. He gave her his number anyway in case she ever got one.

And one day, she did.

It was an unknown number that texted him that day, sending him a picture of the sea with the line 'Does it looks familiar?' under it. It was indeed similar to the picture he had drawn and he immediately knew it was her.

He grinned so brightly and stared down on his phone that he almost ran against the next lamppost but to be honest, he wouldn't have cared.

Her number was saved quicker than anything and for a moment he thought what he could write her back before he grinned even more.

 **Killian:** I'd rather have a picture of your face.

 **Emma:** You gotta work for that, buddy.

He laughed and shook his head while he watched out for more lampposts before he typed back.

 **Killian:** Tell me what I have to do and I will do it.

It took her a long moment to answer and he actually wondered if she forgot to answer him but it said that she was still online, probably just thinking.

He arrived at home and opened the door without looking, not paying attention to his foster parents when he walked up the stairs, his eyes glued to his phone.

 **Emma:** Draw me something.

 **Killian:** What would you like me to draw?

Another long pause, perfect time for him to kick his shoes off and throw his jacket over the chair, falling down backwards onto his bed, eyes never leaving the screen.

 **Emma:** Surprise me. If you get it right, I'll give you a reward.

He groaned and ran a hand through his hair, biting his bottom lip. He knew her well enough by now but he could draw her so many things, it was hard to focus on just one idea.

 **Killian:** Challenge accepted!

After that she told him about her day, about finally getting the phone even through her foster parents suddenly cared and were against it but this time, she was the one who didn't care. He was so proud of her and told her that, getting a blushing smiley back.

Three days later around midnight he was finally done with the drawing for her. At first he had been uncomfortable with drawing himself, afraid he'd seem cocky or anything but then he remembered the game they had once played where they had guessed how the other one looked. She hadn't been too far off from the truth but she still had wondered how he really looked like. They hadn't been at the picture sharing stage of friendship back then but they sure as hell were now.

He took a picture of his drawing and sent it to her, dropping down on his bed, yawning quite a bit. Homework would have to wait until tomorrow.

 **Emma:** Whoa, is that you?

 **Killian:** Aye. Not quite how you pictured me?

 **Emma:** Idk, I need confirmation.

He snorted and held the phone away with a hand, activating the front camera and pushed his tongue out, sending the picture along, not caring that he looked tired as hell.

 **Emma:** Damn.

 **Killian:** Damn what? Damn Killian, you're so hot?

 **Emma:** Haha, very funny. Damn as in 'Damn that drawing is great'

 **Killian:** Does that mean I deserve my reward?

One second.

Two seconds.

Three seconds.

He got a picture but he really didn't expect it to look like that. She was sitting at her desk, books behind her in the background, obviously doing homework with an unamused look.

His cheeks became red when he realized he had guessed her completely wrong during their game. He had descripted her with brown hair and brown eyes, well too bad. But at least he had been right about the freckles.

 **Killian:** You look stunning, love.

 **Emma:** You don't look so bad yourself ;)

Soon they moved on from just texting and chatting to actual Skype conversations. The first time he saw her, he blushed so hard that she was worried something was wrong with his webcam but he really couldn't help himself, he had never seen a more beautiful girl than her.

She was quite shy during their first skype call, playing with her hair, looking down nervously and he reassured her that everything was fine and soon enough they talked as much as they texted. He lost quite some sleep over it but she was worth it.

It took him around three more weeks to realize that he had fallen in love with her. The way she laughed made butterflies appear in his stomach, when she smiled he had to smile and he was always happy when she was happy over his good morning and good night texts.

At first, he didn't tell her a word, too afraid he would ruin their friendship and telling himself that he lived too far away anyway, that it wouldn't work, that she didn't feel the same.

He really didn't want to tell her, not even when she started to actually date someone named Graham but boy was he jealous. That bloke seemed to be nice enough and he wanted her happy, so he let her go, who was he to tell her what to do anyway.

But Graham didn't last long and he couldn't quite hide his amusement. It wasn't that she was overly sad, it just didn't work out, that was all.

He didn't tell her until one night where he was in his bed, his foster parents gone for the weekend. Not until he had drank half the bottle of rum and cried so long that he didn't even realize that she had texted him because he had missed their skype date.

His arm was thrown over his red eyes, the bottle clutched in his hand while he was almost choking on his tears but after a while he heard his phone vibrating from the other end of the bed. Slowly he raised up, feeling the buzz in his head but he leaned over anyway, about to throw the advice away when he saw that he had a lot of messages from her.

 **Emma:** You're late.

 **Emma:** I'm waiting.

 **Emma:** I'm wearing a Princess Leia outfit?

 **Emma:** Maybe I'm naked?

 **Emma:** Hey, are you okay?

 **Emma:** Killian, please answer me, I'm worried.

 **Emma:** Please…

He wiped his sleeve over his eyes so he could actually see was he was typing while he crawled back to the bed, pushing the bottle off the bed in the process, groaning loudly but not caring enough.

 **Killian:** I'm here.

 **Emma:** Oh thank god, I was so worried! What's wrong?

He bit his bottom lip hard, tears raising in his eyes again and he started to shake.

 **Killian:** Liam's dead.

Silence. A long, cruel silence that was ripping him apart until he saw that she was typing.

 **Emma:** I…oh god. Killian, I'm so sorry.

 **Killian:** Yeah, everyone is.

Only two seconds later she was calling him on Skype and he reached over, about to accept the call but then he changed his mind and pressed the red button. Then his phone buzzed in his hand again.

 **Emma:** Come on.

 **Killian:** I'm really not in the mood to talk.

 **Emma:** You don't have to, I'll do the talking and distract you and you can talk when you want?

For a second he thought about it, running his free hand through his hair before he sighed.

 **Killian:** I look like a mess, I've been crying and drinking and…idk. Doesn't seem like a good idea.

 **Emma:** Listen, I know your foster parents are gone and I can't just teleport myself there but I also don't want you to be alone. Please accept the call?

He closed his eyes, the sound of an incoming call ringing in his ears again and this time, he accepted.

His laptop was on one side of his bed and he was laying down on the other while she was sitting at her desk with her hair in a messy bun, smiling sadly at him. He tried to smile back but failed miserably.

She just started to talk about the most random things and sometimes, she was actually able to take his mind off Liam. It took him around one and a half hours to actually start talking, telling her about Liam's death in an accident on sea and that he thought he wouldn't be able to handle it.

This time it was her who reassured him that everything would be fine and that he was allowed to cry in front of her and that she wouldn't tell anyone.

That actually made him laugh for a brief second and she made a sound of victory.

He grew tired the longer they talked, she more than him but it was good this way. She was here for him just like he had always been there for her.

„I love you", he suddenly said and she stilled in her movement and stopped talking, just blinking at him.

„What?", she asked in disbelief, her eyes widened slightly and she swallowed.

„I love you. I've fallen in love with you, your smile, your laugh, your kindness. I love you and I'm not sorry", he told her, his voice more firm than the whole night, not cracking up like it had before.

She looked at him in confusion before she started to smile softly. „That's probably the alcohol talking but I'm flattered. Maybe you should sleep a little bit now?"

He yawned at that but bit his bottom lip. „Maybe but I don't know if I'll be able to fall asleep."

„How about I just keep talking and you close your eyes? I'll hang up when I'm sure you're asleep", she suggested and he snorted at that but nodded. Bed time story from Emma Swan? Sure, why not.

It actually didn't take long for him to doze off, not noticing that she actually watched him longer than necessary before she finally hung up.

The next weeks were hard for him and he had to deal a lot but yet, he always made time for her. She was his anchor, she was there when he needed her, even in the middle of the nights when his thoughts got too loud and her voice was the only thing that could soothe him.

And he did the same for her, was her anchor in the darkness of her life. He kept her on the ground when she made plans to run away for good now, telling her that she just needed to wait a little longer, telling her that she would be fine.

She never mentioned his confession until he felt better and he didn't know if he was grateful for it or not.

„You once told me that you love me", she casually mentioned during one of their Skype calls, he already in his bed, blanket over his body to ignore the slightly chilly air. Winter was coming along fast and with that, his heart grew heavy. Christmas would come around and he had no family left.

„I still do", he said, not more than a whisper. He was wrong. She was his family now and he didn't care that they have never met each other. She was his light and his everything, the last thing he cared about in live. People might call him foolish and naive but he had nothing left to lose but her.

She was silent for a moment and looked down in her lap before her eyes went back to the screen. „I think I love you too."

And with that, they somehow fell into the whole relationship thing. He could finally call her his girlfriend and she would call him her boyfriend from time to time but none of their parents really cared because 'You have never met this person' and 'That feeling will go away, it's not real.'

But boy, it was real, for him and her the same way. It was young, mutual love with only a whole ocean separating them. Nothing much changed now that they had put a label on it but knowing that she loved him back was one of the greatest feelings he ever had.

Knowing that she felt the same made him feel alive, something he hadn't been since the night Liam died.

 **Emma:** You sent me a package?

He laughed when he saw the message, shoving dinner into his mouth, his foster parents gone on another business trip. They were barely at home these days but he really didn't mind, he was old enough.

 **Killian:** I honestly didn't expect it to come so soon, thought I'd take longer.

 **Emma:** Why?

 **Killian:** Well, Christmas is coming.

 **Emma:** Can I open it now?

He snorted and shook his head, his Swan was so nosy when it came to gifts and surprises.

 **Killian:** No, wait until Christmas.

 **Emma:** You're a tease.

 **Killian:** Of course I am ;)

When he came home from the last day of school before the holidays, he also found a package at the doorstep and smiled when he saw that it was from her. Of course she had to send him something too but he really didn't mind as long as it wasn't too expensive.

He made a picture of him holding the package and sent it to her.

 **Emma:** You still have to wait until Christmas ;)

The boy just groaned and pouted slightly, he didn't even expect something else even though it was tempting to open it now.

On Christmas morning he wished her a good morning, knowing that she was already asleep. The little celebration with his foster parents was over soon and he got nothing of value, nothing he really cared about. The only present he cared about what Emma's, one that he still had in his room.

When he sat down on the bed with the package in his hand, his phone buzzed.

 **Emma:** What a horrible Christmas morning. Hope yours was better. Did you open it yet?

 **Killian:** Nope, I wanted to wait for you so we can open each other's presents together?

 **Emma:** Sounds good! Let me get back to my room so we can skype :)

He grabbed his laptop and waited for her to call while he was already fumbling with the small package in his hand.

„Hey beautiful", he said when he accepted her call and smiled brightly at her. She looked a little stressed but he wasn't surprised.

„Hey handsome." Her smile grew only wider when she grabbed his package. „Can I first?"

He laughed at that but nodded, grinning to himself. „Hope you like it."

After a few seconds he heard how she gasped and tears were gathering in her eyes while she stared down at the drawing before she turned it to show it to him as if he wouldn't know what it was.

„Seriously? That's so perfect", she said in a whisper before wiping her tears.

He had drawn her a picture of the two of them together. „Well, we can't make selfies so I figured that would have to be good enough for your nightstand." His fingers wandered up to scratch behind his ear while he blushed slightly, he hadn't expected her to be this happy about the gift, it was just a drawing after all.

„And a necklace?", she suddenly asked and he laughed, almost forgotten about the second part of the gift.

„Aye, a swan necklace. Figured it'd look good on you." He smiled when she pushed her hair away so she could put it on, biting his bottom lip when it really looked exactly as he pictured.

„It's beautiful, Killian. Thank you so much." Her voice was a little shaky and he remembered the time where she had told him that she had never really gotten any nice presents on Christmas, not even as a younger child.

„You're the one who's beautiful, love", he told her with a soft smile but she just laughed, wiping her eyes once more.

„Now open yours before I cry even more", she said with a laugh and put the drawing aside carefully, looking straight at him when he started to rip the package open.

Inside was a small ship in a bottle. „It looks like a pirate ship, that's so cool!" He exclaimed and held it out with a huge grin on his face.

„Good, I was afraid you wouldn't like it", she told him with a sigh of relief and he laughed, shaking his head.

„I love everything that comes from you."

He really did.

Time flew fast and the urge to see each other only grew stronger. She told him often that she wanted him to hold her when she fell asleep. He told her more often that he would love to hold her hand and show everyone that she was his and he was hers.

Both imagined how it would feel to kiss each other for the first time, if it would be as magical as it was in those movies that had long distance relationships or if it would be even better.

But they were only two teenagers with a shitty life until they met each other. Thousands of kilometers were separating them. None of them had money, she wasn't allowed to work yet and he couldn't find a job, no matter how hard he looked. Both their parents disapproved of their relationship, literally just waiting for the day until it ended.

It didn't. Their love was only growing stronger from day to day. They had their ups and downs like every couple, they fought and made up, they didn't go more than two days without talking.

The more times passed, the more doubts were coming up from time to time.

„Are we doing the right thing?" she had asked him once.

„What if we never meet each other?" he had asked her once.

What if, what if, what if.

Neither of them thought that it was easy and it was probably harder than anything that they had ever experienced. Death, loss, feeling worthless, nothing of it was a comparison to not being able to be with the person you love more than anything else.

„Will you wait for me?", he asked her during a late night call.

„Always", she replied before she fell asleep.

And waiting was what she did.

 **Killian:** I have great news!

 **Emma:** Omg what is it?

 **Killian:** Let me call!

His foot was nervously moving up and down while he waited for her to answer the call. When she finally did, he grinned so brightly his cheeks hurt.

„Oh boy, what happened that you look like a squirrel on speed?", she asked him with a laugh and he snorted, biting his bottom lip.

„I just got a letter. It says that when I'm turning 18 in a few weeks, I get access to the money my mother and my brother left me. It will probably be enough to visit you for a while!"

Her eyes widened and she was silent for a long moment but he saw how her bottom lip started to tremble.

„We will finally be able to see each other", he said when she didn't say a thing and with that, she started to cry and maybe, just maybe, a single tear rolled down his cheek too.

After he turned eighteen, he had to fill out a lot of paper stuff that drove him mad because all he wanted to do was visit her. He told her he would come over during their summer vacation, no matter what his or her parents said. He would find a small motel to sleep in because he would be hanging out with her all day anyway.

„Will you really come?", she asked him in a moment of doubt.

„I promise you, my love", he answered her with a smirk.

And he kept his promise.

When he left the plane in Portland, he looked around nervously. She told him that she would try to pick him up but wasn't sure if her foster parents would let her go.

He couldn't find her immediately so he walked over to the store and looked around, buying a single rose, hoping she would be here soon.

His heart was jumping up and down in his chest, making his throat all tied up while he sat down in the lobby, looking around for her golden hair.

„Killian!"

Her voice ripped him out of his thoughts and he jumped up, looking around until he saw her running up to him, jumping straight into his arms. He wrapped his around her body quickly so they wouldn't fall, pressing her close to him.

She smelled exactly how he imagined her and was even more beautiful in reality. For a long moment they just stood there in their embrace until he heard how she started to sob. He carefully let her down and wiped her tears away.

„I can't believe you're here", she choked out, looking up at him and he just smiled softly, taking her face in his hands.

„I really am", he said before he leaned down and kissed her for the first time in over a year.  
It was exactly the magical moment they had hoped for all those months. Even more magical, if they were honest.

They both took the bus to get to the town she lived in and she told him that she already made sure he got a room in a motel not far away from her home.

„You're the best", he said when she told him that.

„Don't I know it", she answered with a laugh and leaned her head against his shoulder, holding the rose in her free hand.

They held hands for the whole way and probably looked more at each other than at their surroundings. It was unbelievable that they were finally together but at the same time, it felt like it had always been like this.

He checked in the motel and they both went to his room. It wasn't some suite and quite crappy but it would do for the two weeks he was with her. He suggested they would hang out in town but she knew that he was tired and they both ended up just cuddling and talking.

Holding her in his arms was probably the best moment of his young life and she told him something similiar.

When she left for the night she wasn't even out of the door for five minutes until he texted her again that he already missed her.

 **Emma:** Idiot.

 **Killian:** Princess.

 **Emma:** I'll see you tomorrow.

 **Killian:** Yeah. Yeah we will 3

She called the two weeks they spent together the best time of her life. He would agree on that. She showed him around town, avoiding her parents who didn't even know that he was here and he rented a boat to took her sailing because that was something he always wanted to do.

They took a lot of pictures together to make up for the time they had missed and after the first few nights she actually stayed with him in the motel, only sneaking back early in the morning to her own bedroom, her foster parents never noticing anything.

One night he became her first when he made love to her and since then they touched more, made out more and spent more nights together in the most intimate way.

But time flew too fast and soon, the two weeks were over.

They were at the airport and it pained him to see her cry even though his eyes were glassy too. He was holding her close to his body, the embrace feeling like it would never end but it had to.

„Don't leave me", she sobbed against his shoulder.

„I have to", he told her and choked on his own words.

Their feelings were so strong for each other that tearing them apart would break them but they had no choice, they were only teenagers who couldn't do anything about it. Sure, he was eighteen now but he had no money to stay any longer.

„Promise me you come back to me?", she asked him and lifted her head so she could look him straight into his eyes.

„I promise", he said and leaned down to kiss her before the last boarding call was announced and he had to leave.

He broke her heart when he left her alone, crying at the airport but it broke his heart just as much.

They were back to their routine but something had shifted in their relationship. It was way harder now that they had gotten a taste of how it felt to be with each other.

 **Emma:** I can't do it anymore.

 **Killian:** I miss you too, just hold out a little longer.

And she did but that didn't make it easier. Waiting was not her strength and being months apart from each other was breaking her as much as it was breaking him.

He finished school with the best grades possible a few months later and was happy that he finally was old enough to move out. The money his mother and brother had left him wasn't that much but it would do for a couple of months for a single room apartment.

She was happy for him that he finally had his own place and if she could visit him, she would do it in a heartbeat.

It took only a couple of more days until he was shaking so hard that he could barely type out the message to meet him in skype.

„What's up?", she asked him with a confused look, he wasn't even supposed to be home that early.

„They accepted me", he said and his voice cracked a little. The confusion was still on her face so he took a deep breath to explain it. „New York Academy of Art. They accepted me and I will get the scholarship. I will move to New York!"

She cried at the news and he wished he could wrap her in his arms but at least he knew that they were happy tears this time.

The next months were stressful and hectic and they didn't talk as much as they would love to do. He had to prepare for his move and she had to focus to keep her grades up so she could graduate in Spring. He reassured her a hundred of times that she could do it so she could fulfill her dream of going to law school.

„Where would you like to go?", he had asked her once.

„New York of course", she answered him and they both laughed.

Everything seemed to fall into place now and it was a wonderful feeling.

When they first saw each other again, he was an official citizen of New York and yet, their reunion was similar to the time they first saw each other.

She jumped into his arms and he held her close.

He kissed her and told him she was beautiful and gave her a rose. She smiled against his lips and had no desire to let him go.

Only that this time, he didn't need to.

They saw each other more often after he had moved to New York. The train rides were expensive at hell so it was only one or two times in a month but it was better than nothing. Her foster parents knew that he lived in America now and didn't approve of it at all but they didn't care, he never visited her at home anyway.

„Can I come over for Christmas?", she asked him when December was coming close again.

„It would be a honor, my lady", he answered with a huge smirk on his face.

It was the best Christmas he had since a long time. It was the best Christmas she ever had. They spend lazy days together just in bed and the best gifts they got were each other, they didn't need more for now.

He nuzzled her neck one morning when he felt how she was slightly shaking and he knew that it was anxiety over everything that was going to come.

„It will be okay", he said in a soft voice, placing a kiss on the back of her neck.

„What if they won't take me?", she asked him and turned around in his arms so she could face him.

„They would be fools not to", he told her and kissed her nose.

And he was right about it.

The law school accepted her briefly after her graduation and they started apartment hunting. He had a small job at a bar and also sold some of his art to make money, it would be enough for a small apartment for them. She got a job at a diner not far away from their universities.

They saw each other during their lunch breaks, it was only a five minute walk from his building to hers and it made everything so much easier. They met a lot of friends and after a while, they realized they weren't the lonely teenagers anymore they once were. They had friends now, family and most importantly, each other.

„Welcome home", he told her after a date when he walked with her to a neighborhood she normally didn't go to.

„We got the apartment?", she asked in disbelief and he grinned at her before she already kissed all sense out of him.

Maybe they had been naive and stupid back then to fall in love at such a young age over such a distance but now they both realized, it had been worth it.

It had been worth the trouble, it had been worth the anxiety, it had been worth the tears at night and the loss of sleep. Everything had been worth it and neither of them did regret it because love will always be worth it.

„I'm glad you waited for me", he whispered in her ear seconds before he kissed her and the crowd cheered.

They were Mrs & Mr Jones now.

* * *

 _A/N: I hope you liked that little one shot! And remember, True Love is always worth it ;)_


End file.
